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Trash Talking With A Saints Fan

Well, it didn’t take long for the trash talking to start when my friend Jay Stevens and I realized our two favorite teams would be facing off for a chance at the Super Bowl.  Jay is a good friend, and a good sport for doing this segment with me, but something tells me this one may generate a few heated comments.

I let Jay get the first and the last word, but something tells me the Vikings won’t be so kind.

I’m in purple and he’s in black to represent the state of mourning he will soon be in.  Enjoy!

The Saints hosting their first NFC Championship Game in New Orleans against the Vikings. There’s a valid reason you’ve been desperate for the Vikes to keep up with the Saints regular season triumphs, Adam. To avoid coming to the Superdome, where New Orleans scores 33.22 points per game and the crowd will easily take Minnesota’s defense out of the contest. Not that I like living in the past, but I did find a funny fact about the last time the Vikes were in a NFCCG. Kerry Collins put up over 500 yards, scored 5 TD’s and the Giants won 41-0 (record for most points scored in the title game) with an offensive coordinator you’ll be familiar with (Sean Payton). I think we’d both agree that both teams are better than those two teams, however. You thought what the Saints did to Kurt Warner and the Cardinals was bad? You’ll be lucky to even talk about Favre returning to the NFL next season if any member of the Saints defense (especially Darren Sharper) gets a chance at him. By the way, Adam, thank Brad Childress for me for letting Sharper come down to New Orleans for a bit. He’s happy leading a defense that averages over 2 takeaways at Home.

It is interesting that the offseason moves revolving around Sharper could very well be the deciding factor in one of our team’s Super Bowl journey.  However, I tend to think you may be surprised to learn that Sharper can be just as much of a liability as an asset.  Matching up against a quarterback that has only thrown seven interceptions in 17 games, a wide receiver that can jump about 2 feet higher than him, a rookie of the year that can leave him in the dust, a tight end that is twice his size, and a running back that can simply run him over is something that should wipe that pretty boy grin off of Sharper’s face.  His whopping ten missed tackles in the regular season should also be cause for concern.  The fact that we have a different owner, coach, staff, and roster as from our last NFC Championship is all I need to say about that… otherwise I’d be citing the Saints’ decades of suckage… but I won’t.  While the Super Dome will be a very hostile environment, I am glad to hear that you all are underestimating this Vikings team.  That’s worked well for us in recent history.  You better hope Drew Brees gains some new-found mobility between now and Sunday… he’s going to need it.

And I’m glad to hear you’re underestimating Drew Brees coming into this matchup. I believe Brees will have more than enough time, considering his still underrated O-Line and the fact that we still don’t know if Edwards for the Vikes will be active. Oh, maybe you meant he should be scared of Jared Allen, who’s only mustered 5 sacks in Away games against the Packers, Lions and Panthers. Color me black, gold and unimpressed. He won’t have the noise of the “Zygihood” to help him. As for your “Lord Favre”, 5 of those 7 interceptions have come at away games and you’re going up against one of the most aggressive defenses in the league that’s second in the league in Takeaways. And Sharper’s only one part of that. Rice and Harvin will be going up against Tracy Porter and Jabari Greer (who managed to hold Larry Fitzgerald to one catch last weekend).  Shiancoe is about as threatening as his name makes any grammatical sense (or as serious sounding as a last name like Warwas). Your precious #28, Adrian Peterson?  I could cite stats that would prove that Pierre Thomas is a better running back. But let’s stick with AP. A guy who hasn’t run for over 100 yards in a game since November against Detroit.  A guy who when we faced off last season in Monday Night Football was held to 32 yards against a significantly worse Saints defense without Sedrick Ellis. He probably won’t even touch the ball; since Favre will just audible every play away from him and Childress will be left crying on the sidelines. It’s not so much an underestimation of the Vikings. It’s knowing that the Saints can match anything they throw at them.

I’m not underestimating Brees.  In fact, I think he is the sole reason why this team has had any success in recent years.  That being said, he’ll have trouble doing anything if he’s on his back.  Edwards should be fine, but even if he isn’t, Brian Robison is a starting-caliber defensive end with a nose for the quarterback and a motor that doesn’t quit.  So you’re saying Allen only getting 5 sacks in 8 away games is a bad thing?  Outside of Will smith, your entire starting defensive line mustered only 5 sacks all season long… in case your counting skills have diminished, that’s 5 sacks, from 3 guys, in 16 games.  Oh, and rather than looking at the home/away numbers, perhaps you should look at Allen’s turf/grass numbers… glad the Super Dome has turf!  5 picks in 8 away games is bad?  Your beloved “Breesus Christ” has 4 in your HOME games.  That makes no sense, Jay “I got a bitchin’ last name” Stevens.  And I really hope that you are right that Rice and Harvin get single coverage from Porter and Greer, because then we’ll just walk away with the game.  And, yes, Pierre Thomas is a better running back than #28… how is life in Delusionville going for you?  I like how you refer to Peterson’s lack of yards, despite the fact that our play-action caused three of the four touchdowns Favre threw against the Cowboys and teams are still selling out to stop Peterson.  Oh, and you cite a game, from last year… which you LOST.  C’mon, man!  You can come up with some better reasons to doubt my team than this drivel!  If anything, you’ve managed to make me more confident.  All Vikings fans will vouch for this… that we will be able to relate to your pain when your 25th ranked defense ends up dooming your historical offense just like the ’98 Vikings.  We’ll feel that pain, we really will.  I’ll send you a bottle of scotch to help curb the pain.

I’m saying if Jared Allen can only muster 2 sacks against Detroit and Carolina, how do you think he’s going to do against us? What was he doing during the other TURF Away games, roping imaginary pixies? And don’t bust me up with your back-up defensive end. You’re using catchphrases to try and tell me he can play football. Maybe we don’t get the sacks, but the 39 takeaways this season proves that we really didn’t have to pull the QB down to win the game. Just get in his face. Whether we slam Favre onto the turf or not, the Saints will be in his face all day and if the Cardinals could do it at home, I’ll bet we can repeat that. Keep thinking that our secondary can’t man up with your wideouts. Favre will get clocked by Bobby McCray straight into retirement before he’ll find Harvin or Rice open. And before you mention Bernard Berrian, that dog won’t hunt. Because he hasn’t all season. If our former defensive coordinator Gary Gibbs was able to stop Peterson, do you really think Gregg Williams will have to “sell out” to stop him? I will admit, though, I get a little excited thinking about how much Reggie Bush will be giving you fits come Sunday. Can you really defend against a player who will cost you a game if he only TOUCHES the ball an average of, what, 14 times a game? Especially when Kluwe, when he’s not kicking it into the sidelines at the 50, keeps kicking it to him. That might have to be the new Mastercard priceless commercial for the Super Bowl… so the Vikings at least get SOME airtime that Sunday.

Thank you for clarifying yourself on the Jared Allen remarks because your previous attempt was worthless.  And, yes, I think he can do it against you.  Jeff Backus of the Lions gave up 8 sacks this year and Travelle Wharton of the Panthers gave up seven.  Compare that to Bushrods 8 surrendered sacks (not to mention 26 QB hurries) and I think Allen will do just fine lined up against a Lions-esque left tackle.  Brian Robison has accounted for 4.5 sacks on 225 snaps.  Your [insert catchphrase here] starting left end McCray has managed only 1.5 sacks despite playing 396 snaps.  Oh, and sorry for telling you that Brian Robison knows how to play football… I’ll just say that if Robison gets the start on Sunday, you’ll know his name just like you now know Edwards’ now.  And seriosuly, Jay?  You think you will be the one team of this season to not sell out against the run against us?  Your coaches are going to rely on your 26th ranked rush defense to stop Adrian Peterson?  They’re going to allow us to run the ball and control the clock and wear down the few game changers you do have on defense and keep Drew Brees off the field for long periods of time?  Well, you should sure be glad that you aren’t the coach of the Saints, I’ll tell you that much.  The Saints WILL sell out to the run, and the play action WILL work, and Sidney Rice’s 5″ height advantage over any of your corners WILL result in big plays.  Your insistent remarks about how your running backs are game changers while Peterson is chopped liver makes me wonder if I should even put this out on the internet… I hate to think of what the comments will do to your self-esteem.  Oh, and Darius Reynaud’s punt return average is almost twice that of Reggie Bush’s, Chris Kluwe has a better average on punts, our coverage teams do better on punts and kicks, and Ryan Longwell is not your average rent-a-kicker like you guys have got yourselves.  You’re ability to have blind-faith and spew words of encouragement for your team is admirable, but your inability to give credit where credit is due is downright… sad.  Keep it coming, talking with you is getting me to be more and more confident in my team’s chances.

No need to insert the catchphrase for me, Adam. I don’t need catchphrases to prove what Saints players can do. Look, I just don’t trust a punter who looks like Beaker from the Muppets. And I don’t care how far he kicks it, it just gives Reggie a little more time to run around him and juke everyone out of their cleats. And all those WILLS are pretty scary, IF you’re not behind 14 points in the first five minutes, IF Favre can stand in a pocket that collapses quicker than the London Bridge and IF the Vikes can figure out a way to get through our O-Line, which despite having a replacement Left Tackle, has only allowed 20 sacks all year. And sorry, but the NFL is not like Madden, where you can just bomb the ball down the field and have Rice catch it every time because a few 0’s and 1’s let you.  And I might not be so down on Adrian Peterson if he’d get past the line of scrimmage more than three times a game.  It’s probably good that you and I aren’t NFL coaches, Adam, because I’m not as naïve to think that play action is the only way to win football games. Plus, coaches don’t only look at the rankings, they look at the stats, like our “25th” pass defense. Completion percentile: Saints – 3rd, Vikings – 25th. Touchdowns allowed:  Saints – 3rd, Vikings – 24th. Interceptions: Saints- 3rd, Vikings – 27th. Passer rating: Saints – 3rd, Vikings – 27th. And I know you’ll pull out the Vikings rushing numbers and how much superior they appear to be over the Saints, but ultimately, won’t they have to pull a few men out of the box to try and stop Brees on offense? It’s not blind-faith when it’s reality, Adam. Ironic how you’ll attack my liking the Saints when Brett Favre, a guy I heard you for years bash,  stew over, and refuse to acknowledge, joins the Vikings and then you start hugging his jock. Let Favre’s ego and incessant desire for everyone to feed into his prima donna attitude fuel the Vikings chances all you want. But, when the offseason comes around and he’s sticking it to Childress and the fans to make you to wait until September to figure out if he’s going to be your quarterback or not, you’ll realize how much of a mistake it was. I told you he’d cost you games at the beginning of the year. He’s already cost you the #1 seed. What else will he cost you? Can the Vikings fans handle that? Or should they worry more about whether Minnesota will even have an NFL team in the next few years. Saints fans don’t have to worry about that. That might be the only good thing to come out of a Saints loss on Sunday. Maybe the Vikings will have a chance to win a Super Bowl for the final time as the “Minnesota” Vikings. I don’t see Sunday being any different than last Saturday. It may look like a shootout at the start, but it will get ugly quick and will see probably two QB’s retire in two straight weeks. 45-20 Saints. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll invent one catchphrase just to even everything out. Cancel Christmas, Kitchen’s closed, New Orleans will be the NFC Champions come Monday morning.

First Chris Boynton accuses me of being Brett Favre and then Jay Stevens accuses me of being intimate with his “gear”…  Do these people even know me!?!

My prediction will come Sunday Morning.

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36 Responses to “Trash Talking With A Saints Fan”

  1. B. Grant says:

    Like the game will be this Sunday, the trash exchange was close and hard-fought. And like Sunday’s result, you won Adam!

  2. bigjohnny84 says:

    Gee Adam I hate to say it but your friend is a meathead. Didnt Dallas beat the Aints about a month ago? Didnt we just demolish Dallas a couple days ago? I know that doesnt mean anything now but it is a measuring stick of matchups and such.

    • Superchuck500 says:

      Big Johnny:
      But by that very same remarkable logic, didn’t Arizona demolish the Vikings about a month ago? Didn’t the Saints just demolish the Cardinals a couple days ago? I know that doesn’t mean anything now but it is a measuring stick of matchups and such.

      • Matt Mikkelson says:

        But, didn’t Dallas beat the Saints at the very same Superdome the NFC Championship is being played at?

    • Adam Warwas says:

      Johnny, I encouraged Jay to bring the heat… to spice up the segment a bit.

  3. Kevin WI says:

    Vikes weren’t the ones that had trouble beating the Rams…..Saints lost to a 3 win team (Tampa) had to go to overtime to beat a 4 win team (Redskins). Saints lost to Dallas at home which the Vikings destroyed.

  4. julio says:

    To go off big Johnny’s logic…the saints destroyed Zona, who dismantled Minny. this isn’t the BCS.

    And Kevin…didnt Minny struggle vs SF, and lose to Pitt, Carolina, and Chicago all 9-7 or worse teams?

    Who beat who and by how much doesnt mean (to quote Jom Mora) diddly poo.

    Should be a good matchup on Sunday good luck.

  5. Fran the Man says:

    Wow, there’s SO MANY comments a guy could make in response to Jay-Jays weak trash talk.

    But when he said “And sorry, but the NFL is not like Madden, where you can just bomb the ball down the field and have Rice catch it every time”, well the guy just dosen’t understand football (Or Madden, for that manner.
    Didn’t Rice do EXACTLY that?
    Didn’t he have close to 150 yards? 3 Td’s?
    Didn’t he make their DB’s lookk foolish?
    Yep, looked like a Madden game to me.

    We’ll crush them on Sunday.

  6. B. Grant says:

    Gonna say it again… the Vikings kryponite is the grass surface, not the fact they are on the road. I believe the SURFACE of the location is the bigger issue, and will be a bigger deal in the Super Bowl than it will be this Sunday. New Orleans will not have the advantage that Arizona had over us – we excel on a fast track.

    • starrc10 says:

      You are almost always right when you go on the record… should consider doing those confidence pools or something.

      • B. Grant says:

        Careful starrc. I’m the one who didn’t think getting Favre was a good idea, and got upset when we drafted Percy. I really thought Brett was on the downside, and that Percy was a spoiled pretty boy. I got plenty of crow to eat. And should I try to forget either of those items, Tomb will be there to remind me.

      • Tomb... says:

        Excellent memory Coach, and your honesty has not gone unnoticed, nor unappreciated. I won’t have to sing “pants on the ground” while pointing at you. That really works out well for both of us. So thank you.

        The ONLY thing that has me worried this weekend is getting pressure on Brees. We keep him harried and making bad throws/decisions, we win this one.

      • Adam Warwas says:

        Grant… I was the same as you in regards to Favre and Harvin. Surpsised Jay tried to pawn it off like I’m some Favre-lover in this segment, he witnessed first-hand my dismay for the move.

      • J. Stevens says:

        Only surprised that you’ve kinda changed your “Favre” tune, Adam. Even I seem to hate him more than you now…


      • Adam Warwas says:

        The fore mentioned not knowing when to give credit when credit is due… and just because Favre deserves credit doesn’t mean i like the guy.

      • Adam Warwas says:

        Oh, and after Sunday you’ll for sure hate him more than I do.

  7. Tomb... says:

    By the way, Adam, MUCH better job with the smack talkin’ this week. You’ve earned your monster paycheck.

  8. B. Grant says:

    See? I knew I could count on my conscience to be there for me – thanks Tomb.

    Here will be the up and down of our Tampa II. Shockey will have a big day and dance around like a witch doctor after every catch (no offense to witch doctors intended). Yuck! But those highlight down-the-middle bombs should not happen, and we will see if that holds the Saints score down a little. The bend-but-don’t-break approach worked quite well last Sunday.

  9. B. Grant says:

    Adam, did Freds wish a hammy on Jeremy? I’m still worried that Bush will snap a femur.

    Let me assure Tomb and all others that my pants are not on the ground, my hat is on straight, I have no imbedded metal on or near my face, there is no permanent ink on my body, my shoes are tied snuggly, and my hair is motionless. (Not that there is anything wrong with any of those things being different.)

  10. Coach Boynton says:

    Adam, just when did Chris Boynton call you “Brett Favre”??? I know Brett Favre….and you are NO Brett Favre ! LOL !

  11. Adam Warwas says:

    And just for good measure, Jay:

    1. Last Names do make grammatical sense regardless of what they are. Your last name could be dohfglsahgsahgoa and it would make grammatical sense.

    2. Shiancoe is only behind Moss and Fitzgerald for TDs in the last two years.

    3. You say you know what coaches do, which is a laugh and a half, but you tell me rankings mean nothing and then you use rankings as your main point.

    4. Berrian’s down year has still seen him produce more than catches everyone on your team but Colston.

    5. Even your own players are now talking about how they’ll have to sell out to stop Peterson.

    • J. Stevens says:

      Took you a couple days to finally come up with some counter arguments? Not a good sign.

      I understand, though. You, as well as the Vikings (see “earplugs”) are scared for what their in for Sunday.

      When I’m worried, I’ll start up a blog to try and convince myself, too. ^_^

      • Adam Warwas says:

        Seeing as how this is the 20th and this was posted on the 19th and how the word “couple” implies two… how is that a couple of days?

        If you read my blog, you’d know the earplugs are secretly becuase of Joe Buck, haha. But seriously, the Super Dome won’t be able to match the crowd we faced on Nov. 1st… been there, done that.

        Starting your own blog is a great idea… then you can have people besides me make fun of your mis-use of the word “their” in place of “they’re.” And then you can judge a player on how their last name sounds or which muppet they look like for all of Bourbon Street to read (and cringe).

      • Adam Warwas says:

        And as long as you’re begging for more “counter arguments” here you go:

        1. You mention the 41-doughnut NFC Championship game. How’d your last NFC Championship game go?

        2. Darren Sharper has had many chances at Brett over the years, and Brett still hasn’t missed a game… ever. so what’s your point again?

        3. Sharper is happy leading a defense that averages +2 takeaways at home, eh? Good for him, i’m glad he’s happy leading a defense that ranks 20th in points allowed, 25th in yards allowed, 26th against the pass, and 21st against the run! Teams like the Seahawks, Bills, Bears and texans have higher ranked defenses. Congrats!

        4. Of the 12 playoff teams, the Saints rank 9th in post-season defense… behind eliminated teams like the Cowboys, Bengals, Patriots, Chargers, and Ravens. Way to step up defense!

        5. You cite Allen’s “lack” of sacks in away games and then say your team doesn’t need sacks to have an effective pass rush. What makes your team so special that merely pressuring the QB is good enough?

        6. By my count, the Vikes turned over the ball only 18 times in 17 games. The Saints turned it over 28 times in as many games. So perhaps you should be more worried about your team’s tendancy to turn it over, and the fact that we hardly ever do.

        7. The Saints can match anything we throw at them? Just like they did with the Bucs?

        8. Harvin has more receiving yards than Bush has receiving and running combined… and has been a more consistent return man. Why are you sucking his popsicle so much lately… I remember you hating on him pretty badly.

        9. You said you could PROVE that Pierre Thomas is a better than Adrian Peterson… I’m waiting in giddy anticipation… bring on the stats!

        10. And, no, the vikings will not have to pull guys out of the box to stop Brees. The Vikings never have many guys in the box to begin with because our D-Line kicks that much ass.

        Oh, and let me know if you’d like 10 more, I got ’em. Or 20. Or 30. Or however many you like.

  12. […] Vikings Gab: Vikings Gab has been doing a good feature recently where they’ve talked smack with the opposing teams’ fans for the week. This week it’s a Saints fan, who ends up sounding like a bleating lamb, in defense of his team. Me? I would have called him a bleeding cyst instead. […]

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